I sit at my keyboard smiling. I’m smiling for the silliest
reason. I’ve learned that I am a seriously emotion-based writer. When I’m sad,
I write, when I’m in love, I write, when I feel lonely, I write…you get the
picture. I’m smiling because I’m at a loss as to what to write. I’m not in
love, I’m not sad, I’m not angsty, I’m not pining for a man I can’t have, I’m
just, well, here. I find that amusing; a slight relief actually.
I keep trying to date; I’m not very good at it. Something
about my lack of patience seems to keep my tolerance levels at an all-time low.
And I’m actually fine with that. It means I haven’t rushed into anything stupid
(can’t say that’s always been the case, I have a tendency to jump right in head
first). My head is clear, my heart is far from closed off, but I’m just kind of
existing in my own world without feeling the need to include a man in it right
now.
Oh, don’t get me wrong, I have a short list of men I’m
interested in. One is showing some serious potential…nothing like a man having
the face of an angelic little boy, but lots of tattoos and a self-professed
bad-boy…oh yeah, and the fact that he sounds
So, if the world ends tomorrow (not that I expect it to, I
have to work…sure sign that’s exactly what I’ll be doing), I can honestly say
that I have no regrets; I’ve lived my life and made my own choices. Some choices
weren’t always well thought out, but that’s just me and I wouldn’t change a
single thing. I have some of the best friends a girl could have, I love my
family and I’m open to whatever life has in store for me. I’m actually looking
forward to it. I feel some new experiences and adventure are in my future and I
can’t wait! I may even have to start making my own “vlog”, like Tessa has…because
lord knows I have no shame (see one of her videos below for an example of THAT).
Maybe I’ll even start writing seriously again. You never know…
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